"Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains just a single grain; but if it dies, it bears much fruit... those who love their life lose it... now my soul is troubled." Jesus as described in John 12:24, 25, 27
It's heart-wrenching. It's true. Creation and even the One who according to John "was in the beginning with God" dies in order that new life/fruit might spring up.
But it's not suicidal, it's not a giving up on life or a turning inward so that he can't see anything but death. Jesus loves life. Jesus loves people and wants to be with them... so no wonder his soul is troubled as he looks to the cross. It's one thing to be compared to the healing serpent in the wilderness, it's another to face the "lifting up" that will mean death on a cross. God loves the whole creation so much that God gives us Jesus who walks with us even to death--and somehow, doesn't beg to get of out of it... doesn't run away... says to disciples who can't even bear to think about the cross "when I am lifted up from the earth [on which I love to walk], I will draw all people to myself."
And so we're drawn in... to the story, to Jesus' stretched out arms, to Jesus' loving embrace.
And the seeds of the Spirit's calling are planted... and wait to sprout and grow.
In this fertile season,